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11-09-2002 - 04:44

so, raq's whipping up a cool new template for me. it will be in black and white and have a hypnotic circley thing. i'm not sure how it's all going to work out (yes, i am very ignorant in these matters), but i guess one day i'll give her my password and then later it will just magically appear. (well, at least as far as i'm concerned, it will be just like magic.)

i had a weird dream last night. it was the future. i worked for a law firm. in this reality, people who murdered others went through a really strange trial/sentencing. it was my job to travel into the future on the time-line of the person killed still being alive and having to tally the number of people who would have lived if the deceased person was not killed. we couldn't change the future or the past...just visit/re-visit it. so, in this dream, i had to hit a time-line for a nurse who was killed. in her time-line, one of her great-great grandsons discovered a cure for some weird disease that caused bones to "dissolve". since this would have saved millions of lives, the guy who killed her would be sentenced harshly. i woke up just as sentence was being served. yeah...i have strange dreams.

i'm drinking tea right now. just had some apple cinnimon oatmeal.

i can't wait to move. i'm still trying to figure out how i'm going to go about actually moving...being that i have a two seater car with almost no trunk space...

i'll also need a futon...hopefully delivered. the way i figure it, i'll actually have the place all to myself the first night since i don't think ryan'll move in till the next day. that's going to be kinda weird.

i still need to find something to do thrusday night. did i have plans with ryan this weekend? i'm not sure. i'll have to call him during daylight hours.

i can't sleep. i can't wake. i'm bored. i'm anxious. i'm normal. i'm weird. yeah....

"would you be willing to take me for my word...if i told you i was falling, if i told you things i'm sure you'd heard. would you stand up and walk away or stay here tonight? would you laugh at what i say? i'm singing you this live song...someone probably sang for someone else and there's nothing new about it...except maybe that i've never felt this way. please don't stand up and walk away...stay here tonight...would you laugh at wha ti tonight. it's hard for me to say things without joking 'round, and around and around...and it's hard for me to look at you...without feeling like i've been drowned and saved again. please don't stand up and walk away...let me stay here tonight...please don't laugh at what i say...would you be willing? would you be willing?" -dogs eye view



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