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26-07-2003 - 06:06

ah. an interesting night.

a bunch of us saw the new tomb raider movie and then went out to the club. after that we had pizza. i had fun tonight. there wasn't the regular drama. and i got someone's number. garrett. cute guy who works at the pizza place.

and now my hair is wet and i'm slightly annoyed.

my hair is wet as i had to wash it twice to get the fake smog smell out. the club overwhelmed us with fake stale smelling smog for about ten minutes.

i'm annoyed because of something ryan told me. he says it's true. and i don't think he's ever lied to me before. (withheld the truth, yes. but lied, not that i know of.) ryan told me that he had a conversation with andy. asking him why we never dated. ryan is convinced that andy had/perhaps has an interest in me other than being friends. now this is what bothers me. there have been many times where andy and i were hanging out (often times alone) and where we had been drinking. nothing happened. if a guy were really interested in a girl. after years of knowing her, he would have said something. after drinking, he would likely be more honest about things. andy has never said or done anything that would show he had any non-friend interest at all.

i love the time before the sun is up. daylight is just starting to make it's presence. i love the light...the pinks and blues that meld into the darkness. the odd feathery clouds. coulors of robins eggs...cotton candy...peaches... you don't even realize how fast it all happens. you look up and it's dark with a hint of light. glance away. and upon looking up again...the darkness is gone. magic.

anyways. the sun is coming up. i should be off to bed. i vaguely wonder/care if garrett will call me. i'm not sure if i'll call him. who knows.

"show me how you do that trick. the one that makes me scream she said. the one that makes me laugh she said. and threw her arms around my neck. show me how you do it. and i promise you. i promise that i'll run away with you. i'll run away with you. spinning on that dizzy edge. i kissed her face and kissed her head. and dreamed of all the different ways i had to make her glow. why are you so far away she said? why won't you ever know that i'm in love with you? that i'm in love with you? you. soft and only. you. lost and lonely. you. strange as angels. dancing in the deepest oceans. twisting in the water. you're just like a dream. just like a dream. daylight licked me into shape. i must have been asleep for days. and moving lips to breathe her name. i opened up my eyes. and found myself along alone. alone above the raging sea. that stole the only girl i loved and drowned her deep inside of me. you. soft and only. you. lost and lonely. you. just like heaven..." -the cure



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