31-01-2006 - 02:11
ah. how things are right now...
my last semester is over. i'm not sure how it went yet. granted last semester ended quite some time ago, but exams had to be finished. this current semester is a bit insane as well. i definitely feel like i'm in over my head with this whole programme, but at least now i'm back to thinking that i can handle anything. i'm still not sure if i'm cut out for a masters programme for smart people, but if i can make it through this, there are millions upon millions of benefits. bleah. biomedical engineering and forensics. bleah.
let's see. i'm still dating the ninja. since my last update, we've had quite a few fights. broken up and immediately gotten back together. and finally really started dating. depressions runs in his family and we're pretty sure he has it too. it's part of why he does so much physical activity and such...endorphins. so, we actually got everything out and things seem to be going well. i'm not sure how they'll turn out, but at least we now know exactly what we're working with.
other concerns...one thing i am a little worried about is my grandfather. i'm thinking alzheimers or just bad memory. he's forgetting little things. some of them are dangerous for him. the other day he left a pot of soup on the stove top burner until it the liquid was gone and what was left was starting to burn. not only is that part dangerous, but he often times will sit down and doze off for a bit. so, this is a bad combination. also, he's sometimes forgetting that he's had something with sugar in it. he'll eat something and forget that he ate it and then not balance out the rest of his meals and his blood sugar will be extremely high. i'm just really worried that one of these days he might forget to take his insulin or take too many of his pills again and maybe he won't catch the discrepancy. i see him at least once on every group of days off that i have, but if something were to happen, i worry with him living alone and everything.
on a happier note...i had also realized that i was pretty messed up and just completely drained i every way after my grandmother died. after realizing this, (not sure how i didn't see it, but i missed it for quite some time) i have now transitioned back to "normal". sometimes all it takes is to realize somethings wrong or just not quite right for things to change. and it's a new year. last year was probably one of the worst years i've ever had. luckily, this is going to be a great year.
well, that's about it for now. think i'm going to put the kettle on and maybe find something to eat.
"anata mo watashi-tachi mo. osoraku dare-mo ga mina. karada o iya kokoro o. iyashini umi ni dekakete yuku no-deshou ne. oh yeah..." -puffy amiyumi
"you, us and probably everybody goes to the sea to heal our bodies or maybe our souls. oh yeah..." -puffy amiyumi