02-04-2006 - 10:07
so. yesterday. april fools. daylight savings.
lee and i corresponded via email all morning. i received 23 emails from him and responded 22 times. that is the most emails i have received from anyone in 24 hours or less. likely even the most emails i've received from someone in an entire week.
he's a strange contradiction. an atheletic musician. a semi-shut in introvert who likes people.
some more email clips:
"I also when was younger could pass for a half asian. My name is Lee. When I was a kid I had big hair. My hair is black. I was athletic and quick. You might imagine where I'm going with this. Let's just say my nickname was Bruce Lee for years and years. Kids were so unimaginative where I grew up. Tragic."
"Here's a funny story: I just locked myself in the lobby at work. There are only like three of us here today and they are at the other end of the office. It's a decent sized office as well. Well anyway, the bathroom down here is in the side lobby. This place is set up where people can get in on regular business days but can't get in past the side lobby unless someone lets them in. we have key passes. I went to the bathroom and the candy machine and forgot my keys. So I couldn't even leave in my car and go home. I finally remembered Rob's extention and called up my work. On the fifth time he answered and came and let me in. I spent about 25 minutes in the lobby."
"I'm fine with my weird personality and what not. i'm even fine with my unconventional look otherwise. I'm fine with the height as well...cos I have no choice in the matter. I just do wish I were taller...but oh well."
"I told you I really don't dance. And if I do it's whilst really really drunk or just to get a laugh and be silly. So...no i haven't
"How's your day been going? What are you doing later? Anything interesting? I can live vicariously thru you and your more interesting life."
"i'm assuming i'll email you gain tomorrow. Cos..I just think I probably will."
so. he's interesting. talking to him gets me over the ninja. i realize more and more how bad we had meshed dating-wise. i realize more and more how much i like a guy who takes a verbal assault of questions right off as interest. who makes me laugh out loud even via email. someone who is aware of past baggage, and owns it. doesn't let it own them. the last time i thought of the ninja in any non-friend way was likely that night after we talked. and then something just turned off. i'm not sure if it's off for good, but i'm fine with it being off for now. i guess it's easier now that i've stepped back and realized how miserable i was with him. i'm kind of happy that i spent my miserable depressed year with him though. he already seemed there, so i don't feel like i drug him there kicking and screaming. we just mutually feel into it for a while. but i realize that i want a guy who wants to be with me. maybe take charge once and a while. someone i can sit with in silence or speak with for hours. someone who can show up at my place with food and beverage, and say "everything's here. we're not leaving your apartment today. maybe not the bedroom either." someone that can be low-key spontaneous. who doesn't have to have plans. maybe just a "keep wednesday free from 7-midnight"...and just pick a city and find something to do. then have pancakes in the morning.
i have also decided that beckie is not a girl. i get along with her too well. i've noticed that when we hang out just the two of us, i find myself talking with her about things that i normally wouldn't talk to people about. it's kinda funny. and, last night we went out to 5th ave. no scotch was consumed. we only had girl type drinks. at least for the most part. i think it's the first time ever i've had a raspberry white russian and a vodka cranberry both in one night. and...the best part was we were wondering what we were going to do to kill time post-bar, pre-mcdonalds breakfast. well, daylight savings time solved that. got double breakfast from mcdonalds, we talked. i drank a half carton of orange juice. felt a tad icky. drank water and was fine. i think i was dehydrated though. i had a dream about being at my parents house and having to keep putting warm bottled water in the fridge. when i woke up, i had 700ml of water times two. still drinking more...
"i want a girl with a mind like a diamond. i want a girl who knows what's best. i want a girl with shoes that cut and eyes that burn like cigarettes. i want a girl with the right allocations. who's fast and thorough and sharp as a tack..." -cake