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04-17-2008 - 01:21

i'm in a fantastic mood right now. i've been getting back lots of info on the tango lessons and i really can't wait. i just hope that dean doesn't laugh at the fact that my first really high heel dancing will be for tango lessons. i knew i was just letting too much pass me by and that i wanted to do new things...i can't believe that i'll be learning the tango and going to australia all this spring. i really can't even express in words how excited i am for all of this.

anyways. i did talk to the boy tonight. normally i hate talking on the phone. being socially retarded, i have a hard time reading how things are meant over the phone. appearently he's not a phone person either. he seems to be a really nice guy inside...i just don't think he always projects it well. are we friends? i'm not really sure. would i like to be friends with him? yes. would i be interested in dating him? maybe. though lately, i've been becoming less and less concerned with his interests in me. would i be interested in seriously dating him? negative. granted, if i met a great guy and he asked me right now to fly out to vegas and get married by a japanese elvis impersonator, then i likely would...but as strange as it sounds, i'm really not interested in a serious relationship right now. serious relationships usually mean marriage try-out. and i just don't think marriage is really for me.

my one major hit today was the fact that someone accused me of lying. which for someone like me, lying is a lack of honor. it's pretty much the worst thing a person can say to someone aside from insulting dead relatives. i really do have a decent temper for most things, but i have to admit that having some accuse me of that make me so angry that it usually almost puts me into tears. over the phone it's not as bad, but i think that if someone said that to me in person, it would be worse. one of those either walk away or hit them kind of things.

well, on another grandfather is going to be out of town for the weekend. i think that i might have a picnic in my grandparents garden on friday just so my grandmother isn't alone. i think that maybe i'll cook least some things. i do plan on wearing my pink sakura furisode with maybe the black read and gold obi. though i might wear the red more plain one that my grandmother gave me before she died. i haven't really decided yet. i do have to air out the kimono tomorrow though. i think i'm also going to have to buy some sake. i do already have the insence set out. so, all in all, i think friday will go quite well. then i just have to see what i'm going to do friday evening. i might sound a little full of myself, but i am going to look fantastic friday.

as for tomorrows other plans...i guess the plan will be for laura to meet at my place and then we can drive to royal oak together. from there we'll carpool with either ryan or beckie. then onwards to proof for martini's, dj-ing, and a portishead crowd.

i guess i've not much else to share right now. the end.

"jen, don't be scared, no don't be shy. we used to to this all the time. yeah yeah you know it, jen. is't you and me, what could that mean? you can't pretend we're only friends then walk away. no on's looking now. take a chance, come on. could do anything you want. jen, put your arms around someone soft. take it as it comes, trust your heart, trust me..." -jimmy eat world



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