05-09-2011 - 04:24
so, my crazy guy weekend started with a friend of mine telling me that when we hang out, he doesn't know if he should fight me or kiss me. things got even more strange from there.
while my dream (literally a dream i've had many times) of drinking absinthe and having someone play live music in my living room was fulfilled, things diverted from there.
i've come across someone that i can not read at all. what i thought was completely wrong. while he may not like me, i at least know his affections do not lie where i originally thought. i'm not used to completely not being able to read someone. not even in the slightest bit. so...to be completely honest. i don't know if i like him. do i actually like him? or am i just mesmerized by what i don't understand? i do so love to watch him play...but then again i love to watch anyone play.
so, things started with his power being out. i offered to all of my powerless friends a place to crash in the air conditioning. he took me up on the offer. drinking and talking and not a thing happened aside from me learning many strange things. he slept on the fold out couch bed as intended and i slept in my room as intended. in the morning i went out there to wake him up since he had to be up early. he's as difficult to wake up as i am. we got in a "fight" over a blanket. next thing you know, we're lying on the floor next to each other. i still didn't think anything was going to happen (and not much did). it was strange. oddly comfortable. oddly "normal". he grabbed my hand and pulled it around him to his chest. and we're just lying there wrapped in blankets and i can feel his heart pounding away in his chest. then he turns into me and there's a slight pause before we kiss. i normally would not chronicle something like this in such detail, but it just really surprised me. not at the time, but looking back on it. and i still can't read him at all. i mean, nothing happened while drinking, but then something happens when sober? was this just a one time thing? do we pretend it never happened?
it's just so weird. i do know that when he kissed me, i kissed him back. i also know that it's been a long time since someone has kissed me and just suddenly felt weak. if i would have been standing, my knees would have buckled. i just don't understand any of this. oh well. things will eventually sort themselves out or they won't...
"...un monde fou entre nous." -rupa