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30-08-16 - 02:37

no luck yet on finding a new job. i definitely need to keep looking. too many people getting maimed on a fairly regular basis.

i'm stealing away a few sips of talisker scotch. it was a good investment.

such an odd mood right now. guess it's time to let the contents of my mind spill out...

i was up for 25.5+ hours yesterday. ended up sleeping for 4.5 after the conclusion. it was my cousins birthday and i fear he doesn't have many more left. we celebrated at the medical rehab facility he's at right now. not sure if he will ever get out, but i hope so. although with my lack of sleep i felt like some fresh knew hell that i had previously yet to discover. i woke up feeling rested, but everything was sore. like the worst hangover but with none of the fun leading up to it.

i talked to shawn this past weekend online. we discussed out 'encounter' as he put it. i do wonder how things would be if we lived closer to each other. i do have to say, it was the best ending i've ever had to buying a guy a drink. so, what do i think... i still like him. first time i've ever had an off and on crush on someone for this long. it still feels like an odd dream that anything happened. great kiss though. oddly, the first kiss i've had this year. or non-greeting kiss since the dominican republic. i almost feel like i've been slacking. i do find it incredibly cute that he was concerned about the general enjoyment of said encounter. sadly, even though things progressed past any point from the past, i still let nate down. he was joking before comic con that he was half expecting shawn and i to get married and run off. which is funny since nate missed comic con to get married.

i'm hungry right now and lazy. considering making some miso grilled eggplant. i still need to clean my apartment. do a million other things. stop having weird dreams.

dream one from the other day: i had a dream that the government accidentally released some sort of nanotech. it was designed actually to help soldiers. soldiers injured who were able to physically recover, but had brain injuries. mainly from blast overpressure. this nanotech would have helped repair neural connections. in my dream, they didn't realize that the tech could spread like ebola through bodily fluids. after months where people didn't realize it had spread, a few people started coming in to emergency rooms for unknown medical issues. it turned out that they were adverse reactions to the tech. then investigations, media hype, mass panic. finally things started to die down. yes, most people had them. but people thought they couldn't do anything. harmless. until a chinese hacker group was able to access them and control people. literally hacking people. i woke up shortly after things started to get out of control.

dream two from today: i had the most amazing dream that i was in a train station. i was with someone and we were stranded because an accident had delayed trains for 24 hours. we ended up having to check into a nearby hotel. it was a pg dream, but we were in a comfy giant bed watching movies until we fell asleep. then i woke up to delicious coffee. it was a great dream.

still in a weird mood. this is spaced out over a long time span. i'm currently watching murder she wrote on netflix.

'suppose i never ever met you. suppose we never fell in love. suppose i never ever let you, kiss me so sweet and so soft. suppose i never ever saw you. suppose you never ever called. suppose i kept on singing love songs, just to break, my own fall...' -regina spektor



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